I hadn’t long been a parent when I discovered a quote from Rudolf Dreikurs, an Austrian psychiatrist, who said “Children are keen observers but poor interpreters”.
It stuck with me and as the Big Sister becomes more aware of world events, I’m once again reminded of the quote. Just what does she make of the stories she sees on the news ?
This week we've had numerous conversations about the news.
On Saturday morning, we watched a breakfast news show and Bruce Jenner’s interview was the story de jour.
“Is that a man becoming a woman, mum?”
“Yes darling. Sometimes nature makes mistakes. He has a woman’s brain and a man’s body and it makes him unhappy. He wants to have a woman’s body.”
“Did God make a mistake?”
“No darling. You know how babies grow in mummies’ tummies? Lots of things have to happen when the baby is growing and sometimes things go wrong.”
The conversation finished there and I breathed a sigh of relief that I’d got God and myself off the hook.
Then on Sunday morning, news broke of the earthquake in Nepal. I tried to explain to her the magnitude of the disaster. That it is a poor country that will struggle to provide medial help to the injured and necessities like clean water to the survivors. Footage of the iconic Dharahara Tower flashed on the TV and I explained that 200 people were trapped inside when the tower toppled. She matter-of-factly said that she understood. “It would have fallen over and they would have been squashed.” Good observation, poor interpretation.
I don’t know how to explain the executions of eight persons in Indonesia last night. I don’t know how to tell her that some wrongs are punished by death. I cannot think how to tell my fresh faced, ever optimistic seven year old that not everyone believes in redemption. Not everyone gets a second chance. So I’ll leave the TV and the radio turned off and hope I can shelter her from the harsh realities of life for a little longer.
There will no doubt be more situations like this, where the events of the world are too brutal for me to allow it into our home. Too dark to allow entrance for fear they'll cast shadows over our children as they sleep, laugh and clean their teeth.
Eventually my girls will grow and they’ll no longer need sheltering. Until then, I’m the sentry at our gate. 
how do you talk to your kids about current events?
Have A Laugh On Me says
My kids haven't asked much but have heard it on the radio. You know me I close my kids off from most media reports etc as they are too young and I want to wait to show them the horrors of the world. x
This Charming Mum says
That's an excellent quote. I find these huge news stories so, so difficult because they saturate the media. It's not just a case of not watching the news, it's the ad breaks on TV and radio, headlines of newspapers, and even the kids at school who let little snippets of the story out. My oldest (8yo) is very observant so I do my best to give her honest but age appropriate responses, but this week I'm at a loss.
Amanda Smyth says
It's a whole new can of worms once they can read, isn't it Lara? Heaven help me when they can search the internet unaided!
Liz Hollier says
We don't watch news in our house when the kids are awake and we listen to a family friendly radio station to try and avoid most things. Although in saying that it doesn't always work! I don't know if it is better to limit their exposure or not but, I feel they are too young to grapple with issues that I barely comprehend or understand at times. It is difficult enough as an adult to make sense of tragedy let alone our children.
Amanda Smyth says
I agree whole heartedly Liz. I've been struggling to comprehend the events of the past weeks too. x
hugzillablog says
My eldest has just turned 5 and he has started asking those kind of questions. I do exactly as Emily does but he's heard things on the radio. It's one of those things I've always cotton-wooled my kids about - seeing adult content on TV, be it news or in movies or TV shows. Even when they were babies.
Amanda Smyth says
I found myself lunging at the radio a few weeks ago during news reports about an inquiry into historical child abuse in boarding schools. It's busy work being a full-time censor, isn't it?
hugzillablog says
Oh mate, it never stops. And as much as I moan about how hard it is now I know it's only going to get harder and harder as they grow up and become exposed to these things through mobile phones/internet and their peers. I'm not typically a worrier when it comes to the kids but this issue is something I think about a lot and it leaves me feeling deeply unsettled. Kids being exposed to things they aren't mature enough to process. Back when we were kids the nature of technology and the media meant that we were so much more sheltered.
Nicole - Champagne and Chips says
Such a hard thing. I was only just an adult when September 11 happened and I remember my Dad trying to tell me that we would be safe, that things would be OK- just like when I was little. I really wished that night that I was little again, that my Daddy could protect me from the evil in the world.
Amanda Smyth says
I was glad to be with my father when September 11 happened too Nicole. 🙂
Beth Mantle says
Protect them while you can. Once that innocence is gone it can never be put back, and I think we all mourn for that a little in our own lives. It has been a really tragic week for humanity.
Amanda Smyth says
I'm going to show Lil the Nepalese baby they rescued from the rubble on the weekend Beth - a nice hopeful story to cap of what you've rightly described as a really tragic week. x
MrsDplus3 says
I've yet to talk to my kids about world news. I never have it on when they're around so they're still completely oblivious to anything other than the bubble they live in. I'm not sure if that's right or wrong - especially for Josh who is 8 now. I might have to broach the subject sometime soon. We did however have lots of chats during our trip to South Africa as it was very hard to hide all the poverty and shanty towns! x
Keith Hopkins says
My kids were young around 9/11. Days and Days of nothing but that reporting on the TV. Hard to explain to children why someone wants to fly planes into buildings and hurt people...
Amanda Smyth says
I had hard time understanding that too Keith. You would have had your work cut out for you. x
zoejanemeunier says
It's so hard. My eldest is five and I'm relieved that I haven't had to deal with any of those hard questions yet. Your kids sound like they are in very good hands.
Cat from thatbettiething says
We don't have a television at the moment, so that makes things a little simpler at the moment. The big kids (6&7) were very interested in world wars over the ANZAC period and as my husband is a bit of a military history buff he gave a fairly detailed explanation (fueled by many questions) about how and where the war spread. My 6 year old asked "but why did it happen if it is so awful" which took to translate as "is it going to happen again and do I have anything to worry about?" I explained that during world war 1 & 2 the governments were a little like our little kids (aged 1 & 2) and that they were still learning to use their words, and learning to share and understand each other. When things didn't go their way they would use their fists, just like the little boys do. But governments understand each other better and they are better at using their words - just like the big kids!! Simple, and not entirely accurate, but she got the picture!!
Sonia Life Love Hiccups says
I tried to protect my kids from these sort of things and wouldnt let them see the news. Once they get a little older they hear about it all at school and so they demand answers. The best I can do is give them honesty and be prepared to talk it through over and over again as they try to process it. I wish we didnt have to though. i wish they stayed young and innocent to the ugliness in the world xx
Aroha says
Since moving in with mum, Nick has seen a lot of the news. It was never on in our house when it was just me and him and I preferred it that way. But mum watches the morning AND evening news. He is starting to ask questions that his 8 year old brain can't comprehend. I'd rather he wasn't seeing it to be honest. But if they do, then you explain as gently as you can and if they push past your comfort zone you tell them they'll understand when they're a bit older. That's my current MO anyway!
Xa Grimmer says
It is November 5th, 2024 and I am reading your post for the 1st time. Your post is timely, still. The first time I read it through, it made me nod and laugh. I sent it to a friend. Then I read it through again and cried. Today is a very important election day in America. I will carry your words with me, today. Thank you.????????????
Xa Grimmer says
The question marks were supposed to be emoji hearts. Imagine emoji hearts.